CHOOSING OURSELVES OVER FEAR
Rejection is a universal experience that we all share. Everyone has been rejected at one time or another in both personal or professional spheres. Whether it's a job application, a pitch to potential investors, or a creative endeavor, the sting of rejection can be disheartening. What's even more powerful than rejection itself is the fear it instills. The fear of rejection can paralyze us, preventing us from taking risks, pursuing our passions, and ultimately, choosing ourselves over fear.
Conversely, neuroscientists conducting fMRI studies showed that the same areas of the brain become activated when we experience rejection as when we experience physical pain. This is why rejection hurts so much (neurologically speaking). However, if we always remember that rejection is a normal part of everyone’s life then feeling bad about it means your brain is working the right way. Mark Leary, a former psychology professor at Duke University, says. “The fact that you feel bad about rejection means you are a normal human being.” So now we know we all feel bad when we get rejected, how can we rewire our brain to reject rejection (!) and embrace the feelings rejection elicits?
Strategies for using Rejection as Redirection:
Shift Your Mindset: Instead of viewing rejection as a personal failure, see it as a redirection towards something better. Adopting a growth mindset can turn rejection into a positive force for personal growth and development.
Learn from Rejection: Analyze the reasons behind rejection and extract valuable lessons. Use this feedback to refine your skills, strategies, and approaches for future endeavors.
Face Fear Head-On: Acknowledge and confront the fear of rejection. Often, the fear itself is more limiting than the actual rejection. By facing these fears, you empower yourself to choose growth over stagnation.
Build a Support System: Surround yourself with mentors, peers, and a supportive network. Sharing experiences and seeking guidance can provide invaluable insights and encouragement during challenging times.
It's essential to recognize rejection not as a dead-end but as a pivot point for growth and development. Each rejection is an opportunity to learn, adapt, and strengthen our resolve. Successful entrepreneurs and leaders often attribute their achievements to the lessons learned from overcoming rejection.
Here’s a couple of now famous entrepreneurs that faced rejection many times and still got up to do great things. Let’s start with Walt Disney who lived on dog food and was unable to pay his rent in the early days. During a contract dispute with Universal Pictures, he lost creative control of his first character, Oswald the Rabbit. Next, MGM rejected his Mickey Mouse character because the studio believed women were afraid of mice. He was bankrupt twice before he went on to create the brand and multi-million dollar industry that is Disney today. If Walt had crawled into a corner and given up we wouldn’t be enjoying all those characters that have now shaped our childhood and continue to shape future generations.
Next let’s look at Arianna Huffington, founder and previous President and Editor-in-Chief of The Huffington Post Media Group. After she finished her second book and was a famous published author, she still received rejection notices from over 40 publishers. In 2003, she ran for governor of California and received only 1 percent of the vote. She used the knowledge of the political campaign and the internet to launch The Huffington Post in 2005 (In March 2011, AOL acquired The Huffington Post for US$315 million, which now generates over 185.89 million daily visits with the average session duration 11.51 minutes). Despite the many setbacks she faced throughout her career, Huffington advocates learning from your failures to help you refine the best direction and choose the right project for you. Arianna has been named to appear on Time magazine's list of the worlds 100 most influential people and the Forbes Most Powerful Women list. She has gone on to launch Thrive Global, a health and wellness media platform that aims to combat burnout and improve today’s work culture. If she had said it was all too hard after being rejected several times, she wouldn’t now be influencing millions of woman around the globe everyday to take on leadership roles.
Essentially, choosing oneself is the ultimate act of courage and resilience. It involves embracing rejection as a teacher, confronting the fear that holds us back, and forging ahead despite the uncertainties.
We all face set-backs and disappointments - this is part of life’s journey. Why not break the chains that hold us back, face rejection with courage, and choose ourselves first on the road to mastering entrepreneurship?
